The Emotional Highs and Lows of a Touring Musician

Another new year is upon us and I was working on my ebook that is a reminiscence of my 2016 UK radio tour. I was on the road for 4 months with little to no down time at all; you'd be amazed at what can happen in a short period of time. The people I met, other musicians I had the honour to share the stage with and countless rare moments I experienced that will live in my memories forevermore. The ebook will have direct quotes from my journal and details about the moments lived and lessons learned. But while working on it, I was making discoveries about myself and the emotional toll a tour can take on a musician.

Going out on the road is a huge part of a musician's job. We do not have a career unless we have an audience that will buy our merchandise and come out to see us play. I started out as a songwriter and learned over the years there is a big difference between an artist and a writer.

I'm a songwriter first and foremost and having said that, being out on the road for an extended period of time taught me the real difference. The high is vastly different between the two and each have their unique just rewards. An artist feeds off the emotions the road provides. It builds and carries us to the sky, then coming home is an instant drop. The higher you are, the harder you fall.

I started touring and promoting my own music as an Indie artist, in recent years. As a songwriter, I

With Scott Neubert at Smith's in Atlanta, GA

was not having any luck getting my songs heard so I started promoting my own music as an artist. I released my first studio recorded CD, Love and Other Disasters in 2007, produced by Scott Neubert. It received countless accolades from across the globe. I also started getting my music placed in TV/films etc. It was a whole new world and I was making progress. My 4th release, A Few Broken Pieces, landed me a membership to the Recording Academy and I was considered for a Grammy in the category of best new country artist. These are the kind of steps that inspire you to keep moving forward and never give up on your dreams.

I started building a fan base in the UK and went out on a radio tour in August of 2016 hitting every single radio station that would play me, I did live in studio performances and interviews and also hit the open mic scene and played for exposure to build an even larger fan base. Any hard working, serious musician knows, there is no formula to success, no set path, you have to blaze your own trail by doing whatever it takes. In doing so your job becomes your lifeline, the people you meet become your crutches that prop you up and the lessons become your to do list, it is learned by trial and error and so you start repeating what proved to be working.

I got a small taste of life on the road, keep in mind there are musicians that spend an entire year on the road, my 4 months was a taste of a musician's reality and all the ups and downs that come along with the lifestyle. I used to read biographies of all my favorite musicians, mainly to learn what worked for them, best way to be a musician is learn what the greats did in order to make a living

Kevin Wrapson and Helen Bawden at
the Manchester airport

doing what you are trying to accomplish. I read countless stories of depression and mental illness and the instability that lurked in the minds of most of these stars, I often judged them and thought suck it up, you are doing what you love, why all the whining….However, now I get it, probably more than ever.

Here in the USA I would go on short tours, hit different regions, 10 days on the west coast, 10 days in the Midwest, etc. After, I would come home it would take a couple days to come off the initial high then I'd fall right back into my normal routine and plan for the next road trip and write new songs. I never felt anything other than a bit of fatigue and I bounced back pretty quickly.

This time was different for me. I packed my bags and grabbed my passport and journeyed to another country with the intention of staying as long as I could with a goal of promoting my latest CD, Safe Haven. I was already building a following in the UK and Lucky me, getting a fair amount of radio play, the tour was easy and I bounced across the country and circled it twice hitting each station that was playing me as well as being sent to new ones all over the radio community. I would promote live performances on the radio shows and started getting a nice draw in all the rooms I played, which got me more invites to play again and many brought me back as a featured artist.

This was it, it was happening, people were noticing and giving me positive feedback every single time. I cannot describe to you the sense of accomplishment as an artist to have a stranger buy your music and walk away genuinely happy as if they have just won a prize. As a songwriter, when that happens, you know you have done your job right. It is like an office worker getting a promotion or recognition for a job well done. There is not a lot of rewards or compensation for an indie artist, so these little natural highs are the gold that keeps us focused on our ultimate goals.

You win some and you lose some it is the nature of the beast, but when you get on a roll and everything is going right, you feel in your mind you are unstoppable and that is the best reward any musician could ever ask for throughout their creative career, in my humble opinion. It certainly gave me a new sense of self worth and a confidence I have never felt before.

Coming home and what happened to me mentally caught me off guard and not what I was expecting. I still have not adjusted to the normal. For 4 months my normal consisted of trains, planes, couch surfing, meeting new people, rewarding interactions that lead to new opportunities, every single day. Since I have been home the high has turned into a low. I had to remind myself of what was accomplished while I was away. Nothing felt grandiose anymore. Nothing held anything that felt

The Basement in Chelmsford, London UK

extra special. I think for me, when talking to family and trying to explain to them how empty I feel now, it becomes glaringly obvious, the reality that, yeah I felt special, but obviously it was not real, I'm nothing more than I was before I left. All those insecurities rush back to rear their ugly faces and stop us dead in our tracks.

I finally get it, I do not think I am alone in these feelings, I think most musicians no matter what level you are at, feel lonely after the crowd has gone home. Like a junky hooked on a drug, I now have a need to feed a crowd and be heard. As an artist making that connection with an audience feels almost as good as it did when I wrote the song.

My family is my songs, my life is my career, my self worth comes from my success and I feel my success is measured by how many people listen and give positive feedback. This is only the beginning for me and I want to give props to all the ones before me that taught me what it takes to make a dream, reality. I want to show respect to the ones I used to think were whiners. The road is not an easy journey to partake in, however the rewards are vast. Please forgive us when we are not ourselves or the person you are used to seeing. Artists are extremely emotional people that seek comfort in very unconventional ways. The world is seen in a different light and artists by default has a self centered nature that makes it hard to understand, that most people, simply do not understand us.

I feel very fortunate to have the opportunity to be able to follow my heart and dreams. I am even more grateful that I have a group of people that love and respect me enough to follow me on this crazy journey we call the music business. The Hoskettes, have created a family that looks out for each other and that, especially in the times we are living now, is not an easy thing to accomplish. This Fan group has become a safe haven for me, a place I can go when I need to feel like I am a part of something.

The Uncommonground in Chicago, IL

I'm a pretty positive person and a firm believer of visualizing the success you want for yourself in order to create a reality. But those visions do not come to fruition without putting forth the effort and that work is never easy. Creative people are humans, like everyone else, we have good days and bad days and most of us have crippling insecurities which is the reason we crave your attention, it is our reminder that we do have something to offer, in a society that we usually do not quite fit into like others do.


Thank you for the blessings, I say this often and hope it does not diminish its meaning, but I cannot be me without all of you. Thank you for the attention and love you have shown me from the beginning and all the times you've picked me up during the in betweens from one failure to the next successful step. Thank you for always believing I could do it, when I did not think I could. Yeah the tour has ended and that feels very sad for me, but the smile comes back when I think of the possibilities 2017 holds.

Here's to another year and may success keep growing, onwards and upwards for all of us, no matter what your dream may be.

Melantha's Storm ON SALE NOW!!!

Melantha's Storm is distributed and available at A Novel Idea, Inc. To order your copy email: anovelideapromos@gmail.com

The Year in Review

Wow, I can't believe this year is almost closed. I have to say 2015 was much better than the year
before. I believe 2016 is going to be even better! There has been a lot of changes that has taken place throughout the year. Some took quite a bit of adjusting, however, like all good and bad situations we learn and grow from every experience.

My year started out with a big win on Artist Signal after countless months of hard work, Myself along side a very active team won a $10,000 reward for being the most popular artist on the site. I cannot not list all the names of those who helped, because the list goes on and on; was a group effort of epic proportions. Some of the rewards rendered as a thank you from me, were songs I wrote to the person who voted for me 650 times, That was sheer dedication that humbled me and I will forever be grateful for everyone and everything you did, the time you gave and interruption of your lives, please know it was then and will always be very appreciated. Thank you for your TROUBLE and for all THE STRANGERs that became close friends. I tried for the win in November and failed and it was the workings of a group of hard core supporters that encouraged everyone to continue to vote in December that got me the win!!! You know who you are and I do hope you enjoyed all the rewards rendered for your assistance. It was the journey that showed me I cannot be me without all of you. An artist is nothing without an audience and I am truly blessed with the most supportive street team ever.

With that reward came many challenges, many of which have been squashed and not worth a mention, but the biggest reward was the lasting friendships and the continued support of so many. The deal was to use that money to get to the UK, well the dream is still very much valid, but the money was not even a tip of the iceberg of what it will take. You all know me by now and when I set a goal I do not rest until it is reached no matter how long it takes. I believe I will and look forward to meeting all of my friends over there in the UK.

Since then our group has grown quite a bit and there are several, post AS, that have joined us along the way. Our family grows daily and we have so much fun, I am spoiled by the interaction and in return I will continue to create art I hope you will always enjoy and love. Scott Neubert and I have formed quite a team musically and I feel my art changes for the better daily, he has believed in me and taught me so much as an artist and an individual, I feel I have grown beyond measure, especially in 2015.

With the winnings I went on to release my 4th studio album, A Few Broken Pieces and it became my top best seller surpassing my debut in 2007, Love and Other Disasters. From that CD the song, No Reason got me on the Hot Disc charts out of the UK, I then released a single, Tonight that hit the top 20 and was also picked up by Clear Channel for iHeart radio here in the USA. Then another single, A Cold Heart Never Melts is slowly climbing the charts as well. I was added to The Wolf Pack Music after sharing countless Friday nights (the reason why Friday's are my favorite days) on The Pack Show with my good friends Russ Williams aka The Wolf Man and Georg Hegelmann. I can't forget to mention where it all started and how they have given me so much support and took me under their wings, The Rock Doc, Northern Girl, Gonzo, Diane Marie, Sheldon Snow and Raymond Rowe. So proud to be a part of the NEWUSB family! Since then the radio stations have grown worldwide and impossible to mention them all, Bright Sky Radio, of which got me on The Best of Independent Country Music compilation CD. That debuted in the top 4 best seller in country music on iTunes. The Yankee Babes, Woman of Substance Radio, Monies Indie Music Promotions, Talentcast to name a few, So many the list goes on and on, thank you all for the opportunity to share my music. 

I have received countless sinc opportunities for TV/Films landing a song on the hit series, The Lost Girl, Bizarre Foods of America, several commercials both locally and nationwide, also landing on ESPN on the Poker World Championship, even a few indie films. I want to thank my licensing company, APM for believing in my music and working hard to get me heard.

2015 ended on an unfortunate note when I was laid off from my job with HP after 16 years of service my position was handed over to India, a sad misfortune that is happening quite often in my country. However, this quickly turned into an exciting adventure as I relied heavily on my freelance work to stay afloat and have had several opportunities arise that have life changing potential. 

I am excited to see what 2016 has in store, the possibilities are limitless and I'm ready to take the bull by the horns and seize life to its fullest. I hope to make my friends and family proud and show the generations to come nothing is impossible without a dream and a whole bunch of elbow grease. So here's to rolling up our sleeves and making all our dreams come true. I cannot be ME with out all of you, thank you for sharing the journey, here's to another year!

Retrain your brain for success, one smile at a time

Humans are creatures of habit and our brains function through repetition. We train our thoughts and our actions through daily routines. These routines become common practice and soon working, eating, sleeping and every aspect of our life is a regular occurrence, none of it feels like work anymore, simply a natural progression of daily living.

In this blog I have argued that creative personalities see things a little different from others. We create a different reality, not seen by anyone else. We share our views through our art to make others aware of what our mind's eye sees. I'm learning through my travels and new people I meet that we all have some form of creativity living inside of us.

In this piece I want to explore the measure of success. What do you consider a successful day, a momentous occasion? Waking up in the morning and accomplishing making another person smile is a very successful day in my opinion. But we all have to make a living and we all have to pay the bills, realistically a smile does not accomplish putting money in the bank. Or does it?

There are countless self help books out there that all say the same thing, The Secret, Life is a Contact Sport and my personal favorite, The Artist's Way. These are only tips of the iceberg, do your own research there are countless books that can help guide you that will speak to your own needs; bottom line is, we create our own reality. Regardless your religious or political beliefs no one makes success for you, except you. Having said that, no one gets there without help. Remember to respond kindly and help others on the journey behind you. Always educate yourself and continuously question the world and all that is involved, knowledge is power and is the number one tool to success.

Actions make reality. Think of a goal you want to obtain and make a plan. Planning and goal setting is a sure fire way to reach any dream. Dreams are reality in the making. Build a trustworthy team that is like minded to your needs. Success is more realistic when learning and sharing your experiences with others on the same path. Failure is not an option, but the pitfalls and road blocks are inevitable, adapt, adjust and overcome. Never let negativity discourage you from a reality that is waiting in the wings.

I propose starting by retraining our brains to think and do different things. Nothing changes unless you make a change. I have spoken of this many times throughout this blog, the repetition is me practicing what I preach, I am retraining my brain, so positive thoughts and actions become second nature it is no longer a chore to accomplish, it is simply how I live. I'll keep repeating it until it sinks in and maybe if you are reading and sharing, it will benefit you as well.

Challenge yourself to The 7 Day Mental Diet, By Emmet Fox. I'm a huge proponent of Emmet Fox's teachings. I'm not saying it is easy, but if you successfully complete it, the positive nature can change your life. I have started and stopped many times and still in the process myself.

Success in my point of view is dusting yourself off when you have fallen and try again. Learn from mistakes so you do not repeat them and keep looking forward. I believe if you do what you love the rest falls into place, I also believe nothing is handed to you, we must always relentlessly set small goals in order to reach the bigger picture. I do not believe you can be successful, by stepping on other people or abusing trust. Karma has a way of coming back to haunt us, apologize profusely when you have unintentionally hurt someone and always help when you are able to do so. I believe you get back what you put out, it is our responsibility as humans to make this world a more loving place. A smile can lead to success because it is creating a habit that soon changes how you think and live and soon the changes unfold as naturally as breathing.

Maybe in the environment we have been living we may have all lost sight of certain habitual luxuries we normally take for granted. Retrain our brains for success. Wake up each morning regardless what challenge you must face and say today I'm facing it with a smile. Ignore the naysayers trying to put negativity in your path. Happy living is successful living and success should be shared and celebrated.

Someone told me once, you only lose if you stop trying, so don't give up. I would love to hear your opinions and success stories, if you decide to try the challenge, please share your experience. If you feel negative feelings creeping in, stop, take a breath, maybe even take a day or two, then try again. We are all in this journey together, we are all interconnected whether we want to believe it or not. The world can be better and as a team we can all succeed one smile at a time. 

There are Angels Among Us Always

The year of 2014 has been life changing for me. Many very rough moments that happened this past year that I thought I would never recover from as it all unfolded. But as the old saying goes, that which does not kill us only serves to make us stronger.

I do not want to dwell on the moments that brought tears but I want to reflect on those chance happenings that changed everything for the better. I believe we all have angels looking over us encouraging us to try new and exciting things. Influencing us in ways, if we are only open to the signs.

I had many angels this year that affected me in ways they may never truly understand. My first angel I met many years ago,  Eva Shaw opened a lot doors for me in the writing world. She has been a mentor over the years and this year, our relationship became so much more. She had helped me grow as a writer and our relationship also helped me grow as a person as well. I will forever be grateful for the lessons I have learned that she so patiently allowed to be revealed. She not only is a mentor but she has become a friend that will always have a special place in my heart.

Then there was a woman I met at the beginning of 2014 who sings like an angel named Rebecca Newman. She had shown an act of kindness by a chance happening of introducing me and my music to her fans called the Newmaneers. I joined her fan page as I had never been a fan of classical music until I listened to her sing. Her voice is an instrument of its own and I was in awe of her talent and even more impressed by the love of her fans. I had never witnessed such admiration for anyone, like the Newmaneers had shown her. I thought anyone that received as much respect as she was given not only had an obvious talent but a generous heart as well; it was an honor to be a part of something that was so much bigger than simply a fan page.

She was in a contest called Artist Signal and won the month of February. I had joined the contest many months prior to meeting her but never really understood that a win could be a possibility until witnessing her hard work. I started paying attention and making friends within her group and I eventually had the honor of a gentleman creating a fan page for me, Kevin Wrapson created a page that eventually soon became what we now know as the Hoskettes. He joined forces with Robert Scullen and I had started with 34 members that generously came from the Newmaneers. Many said they never listened or cared for country music until Rebecca had told them to listen to me. Thank you Rebecca Newman for giving me that chance.
 
I had the good fortune to be able to do a tour in the Northeast with a good friend Renee Wahl. We had a great show in Philly that Jennifer Logue had set up for me at Milk Boy. It was a great crowd and I was also able to meet my friend Andy Whatt face to face as he made the journey from DC to come see me.

Renee and I then journeyed to NYC. I had wanted to play in that city my whole life. Unfortunately it did not turn out as good as Philly, however it was where I met the very talented Micheal Castaldo. He was the only person who said he would come to my show who actually showed up. He not only came to the gig, he proceeded to show Renee and I around Little Italy afterwards and bought us dinner. After my car breaking down and learning of limited time left with my brother and wasting time on a rough gig in NYC; he gave a pleasant ending to an extremely rough day, yet another angel here on earth.

We had to cut the tour short and head back home. I was able to spend some unforgettable moments with my brother that I will cherish until we meet again. He is now with my Mother and I am blessed with angels in heaven as well as on earth.

The Hoskettes are now 183 members strong and we have gained members from all over the world. I have had the good fortune of meeting and joining forces with Ashei and through them I met and befriended Sonja Garard who allowed me to become a member of The Pack. I also met Into The East and became friends with Liv McBride. I also soon met the leader of the Pack, Wolf Man who then took me under his wing and did many radio interviews with me and I eventually made the top ten most requested on Fame Music Radio hosted by Georg Hegelmann out of Johannesburg, SA. These acquaintances have quickly become life long friends I will cherish always. 

I have had a very successful year with my release, My Soul is Already Sold, produced by Scott Neubert. My first release with him since Love and Other Disasters. I have made several cuts on TV and films from songs on this CD, being featured on, The Lost Girl, Bizarre Foods of America, also featured on Delta Airlines, Smithsonian Channel and many more.  Scott and I are finishing up my latest release, A Few Broken Pieces which should be out literally within weeks. We make a good team and I appreciate him always believing in me and helping me make my musical aspirations a reality. He is a God send to say the least.

There are so many others I have not mentioned and you all know who you are, that have impacted me in one way or another. You never really fully realize or appreciate how blessed you are until you sit and count your blessings. There are so many angels that have been there for me through thick and thin. I have been blessed 10 times fold and will never know what I have done to deserve such love.

I will be closing the year with a win on Artist Signal, ironically ending the year basically how it began; with angels looking after me and changing my life forever.

Enter to WIN!

Its time for us to have a little fun. For those of you who know me, know I am an artist as well and work under many different creative realms. I have been hired to do many portraits in recent months and now for a little fun I'm going to give you all the opportunity to show me what you can do!

Starting today until the end of the month I want you all to draw a portrait of ME! It can be a stick figure or whatever you are capable of doing you will be judged on originality and how well you know me, for example, my favorite color is green and my favorite flower is carnations and I play guitar, sing and write! If you can't get my likeness draw a stick figure that will show its me by the things incorporated in the drawing! Be creative and show the world your talent and how much you know me. Another hint, I have two cats name Linus and Speck whom I love very very much! :o)

The winner will receive a never before released completed demo of my song written for my family called, Every Chance I Get!

Meet your judges, my dear friends and 2 people who know me better than my own family, Scott Neubert and Renee Wahl all of whom you should check out their pages and enjoy their music while your posting your drawings of me! Scott Neubert and Renee Wahl

Don't be shy visit my blog and you will learn I believe we all are creative, only not all of us tap into our creative whims, like others do. Creative Compromise! 

So now is your chance to show the world your vision of art and how your eyes perceive one of the artists you enjoy listening to.

You can submit your entries at my fan page: Rebecca Hosking Support Group aka The Hoskettes!
 

Winners will be annouced on Sept 8th after the judges have a week to review all entries! Can't wait to see what you guys come up with! Make me PROUD but first and foremost let's have some fun!

Paz y amor siempre

Monkey Wrench, Anyone?

Funny how life keeps going no matter what, you know when people say, don't feel so bad, no matter how bad things are there is always someone who has it worse. Ever feel like you were that person who had it worse?

God, life is a funny little cycle and time stops for no one, does it? We do our best and make our plans and strive to reach our goals, but some days no matter how you try, there is a monkey wrench and it is jammed right in the middle of everything causing all your hard work to fall apart.

Life is balance and 9 times out of 10 so rarely does any of us actually have the balance we need in order to survive these bumps. We go day to day with our routines thinking there is an end in sight and when that end comes and it is never what we had planned; it makes us feel like we did something wrong.

But guess what, your not alone and you did nothing wrong. Its called life. We can plan as much as we want and be prepared, but no amount of strength or preparation will ever make the bumps any smoother. Some things do not have visible answers, hell, some things have no answer at all. It simply is what it is, good, bad or indifferent. At the end of our life when we have to answer to our maker, I imagine that is when all the mysteries will be revealed. But, who knows? As I have planned this day to come I also think, it most likely will never be like I imagined.

Call it a mid life crisis or a bout of depression or maybe things are right on track for you at the moment. Regardless the state you are in nothing is permanent and nothing lasts forever. When the tide rolls in and we are treading water and struggling to breathe; we have to tell ourselves this too will pass. When we are on top of the world and everything falls right into place, enjoy it while you can, because it will eventually fade as well.

To live with the philosophy that nothing is permanent some find to be grim and bleak. But I find it to be my comfort when I feel like the world is focused on killing my spirit. There is nothing, absolutely nothing that lasts forever. But maybe that belief  is not the complete truth either?   

Humans are riddled with flaws and imperfections, but it is also our nature to nurture and build bonds that cannot be broken by these cycles of hard times. I used to live my life by the philosophy that nothing is permanent, but here I am learning yet again. There is one thing that is constant, there is a monkey wrench that messes with my program of belief.

When I look back on my life and all the hard times I have been through it is true with time the sorrow did pass and the monkey wrench that broke the cycle of sadness was always love. When things were great those good times were always shared with those closes to me and their pride for me was shown through their love. When we lose someone close to us, the love never dies, in fact, it is felt even stronger with their passing.

When it is real and comes from a true place love is the one thing, the only thing, that lasts forever, no matter the circumstances.